Best Fighter Pilot - "I'm not going to make the trip," I said to the flight instructor who had just flown one of our best students.
I expected it - my request was completely unreasonable for him. We knew the student well, I read her flying reports from two previous flying schools and our own squadron where she was learning to be a fast jet pilot in the RAF. She was excellent; Her flying was above average in every way - she worked hard and was well prepared for her flight.
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"But she flew well, it was a good flight, she's a great student, you know that - why should I fail?" he asked.
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"Just think, brother," I said, "he's a 'great student'—where will he be in six months?"
I've always been interested in failure, perhaps because of my own history in flight training. At first I did well on small piston planes and then a bit better on larger planes with faster and more powerful turboprops. But when I did advanced flight training on a fast jet, I started to stumble. I worked hard, I prepared well, I hit the books in the evening, but I still didn't make the jump. Some trips looked good until the instructor told me I had to fly again; The verdict will be a shock.
One particularly bad time was halfway through learning to fly the Hawk, the aircraft used by the Red Arrows aerobatic team.
I failed the final navigation test for the second time - a major milestone in the course.
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Pilots do not show emotion; It prevents us from concentrating on work, so we divide them up and put them in a box on the shelf labeled "for later attention" that they rarely get to. It's a curse that affects us later in life when marriages fall apart after years of neglect due to lack of demonstrable weakness, but today I couldn't hide my dismay.
“It's just a technical fault Tim – don't worry about it, you'll get it next time!” was all he could say as we made our way back to the squadron, the steady drizzle from North Wales adding to my misery.
It's bad to miss a flight once. How well you do in the course greatly affects you. You can often see it coming - you might miss an instrument takeoff and altitude alignment, wander into an airway in a high-rise transport, or forget to secure a weapon switch on a raid. The flight back is mostly silent, the instructor knows they have to fail you for your carelessness and you know it too. Admittedly, due to the complexity of flight, a student instructor can fail at anything and will often miss many small mistakes - but some he won't.
Sometimes they offered to take you home on a jet plane to rest, and it was often safe.
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You can tell students who fail twice on the same path become introverted and hide from their classmates. Even his classmates distance themselves from the student. They may say it's to give their boyfriend some space, but that's not true. They are reluctant to join them if they embark on unsuccessful journeys, even through a kind of strange "unconscious attachment". 'Like attracts like' - Pilots want to succeed in their training and mistakenly believe that failure is useless.
You will usually be kicked out of flight training after a few attempts. If you're lucky and another flight school has capacity, you might be offered a helicopter or airliner, but no guarantees and it can often be career-ending.
Cruel but fair and understood by all – nobody said flying military fighter jets was going to be easy, which is why there are fewer fighter pilots in the UK than Premier League footballers.
The instructor I flew with was a nice guy and on previous flights the phone would often beep which continued in my flying helmet until I "answered" it.
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“Yeah, hi Tim, that's the instructor in the seat behind you mate – you look good – you remember me, we've spoken many times. I'm telling you there may be airways on your nose that you want to avoid.'
All the students know that the instructors are on their side, they want them to pass and most of them will do everything to help the little pilots in their flights. After all, even the instructors were once students.
For Air Force pilots in training, success is clearly important and is the focus of most students. They would work late into the night, come in on weekends and watch flight recordings of other pilots to help them get through another day at flight school.
But for a coach, success is not so important, there is something that interests us more.
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When I was 10, my father took me on a tour of Normandy with a military vehicle restoration group he was a member of. He had a WWII motorcycle that he had restored and when he rode the convoy bike I would travel in a tank or jeep and have a good time.
It was great fun for a young kid and I chatted enthusiastically to anyone who would listen as we got to the various battle sites and spent our evenings camping in the sun drenched fields of northern France.
It was a magical holiday that was to be brutally interrupted by my father's inability to operate the gas stove in the dark.
One morning: 'Get out, get out!' I was rudely awakened by a shout of no and forcibly dragged out of the tent.
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Our gas stove exploded, igniting the tent door that was shining on the ceiling, and everything collapsed one floor below. My father, who was outside the tent at the time, dived through the burning material, grabbed me and pulled me off my feet.
We learn most from our parents, men from fathers and women from mothers. My father was not big on emotions and I still find it difficult to express them to this day.
But by pulling me out of that burning tent, he demonstrated the process of failure in a way that has never left me.
I remember how we were sitting on the bank of the river where he threw a burning tent to us. All our kit was gone and we were now effectively poor. I heard some people nearby laughing that our house was destroyed.
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"I lit the stove in the tent. It was the wrong thing.” He said, “Don't worry, we'll be fine.”
He never looked at me, just off into the distance and I knew at that moment we were going to be okay because he said we would.
And I believed him because there was nothing but humility and honesty and strength in his voice and I knew that at that moment, even if we didn't have a tent anymore, it wouldn't matter.
"It was my fault, I'm sorry I set the tent on fire - I'll do better next time." he said in a rare display of emotion.
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. He made a mistake and used it to demonstrate what failure means to someone - it allows them to take ownership of the problem and allows them to improve.
And I told the flight instructor of a student who was about to graduate from our flight school.
The higher you go, the more you have to fall and it also does a lot more damage. I wondered why this wasn't done earlier in training, but it's easy to overlook.
Our higher achieving student did not understand failure; She did well academically and in her initial officer training, earning awards and honors along the way. She was a good student, but believe it or not, her inner story was one of continued success, and that could suddenly change with the reality of frontline operations.
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“I see,” he said, “it never has to rise. If something goes wrong, at night and when she is alone in northern Syria, she may have trouble recovering. At least we can fail him under controlled conditions and help him bounce back from it.”
Therefore, a good school teaches its students to accept failure and value it more than success. Success is comforting because you don't have to look deep within yourself—you can pretend you're learning, and in a way you are.
Success is just as important
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